


Time to Leave the Garden

by Traillbits



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Crowley Was Raphael Before Falling (Good Omens), Heaven & Hell, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), M/M, Miracles, Original Character(s), ineffable fathers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-28
Updated: 2020-05-16
Packaged: 2020-10-29 18:08:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 17,668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20800745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Traillbits/pseuds/Traillbits
Summary: It's obvious the angel and demon love each other-now on their own side they see no reason to hide it-but something's missing. Something not physically possible, even for ethereal beings of Heaven and Hell. After Crowley and Aziraphale helped save the world, it seemed like the least Adam could do. The only question now was would it be a boy or a girl?





	1. Reality Will Find a Way

**Author's Note:**

> Trying my hand at my first ongoing GO fic, expect the following chapters to get longer. I appreciate a helpful review if it's not too much trouble <3

While Aziraphale had experience with children, he was quite comfortable sitting on the sidelines as the Them played another new game their fearless leader had created. Not that he didn't trust the youngsters, they did after all assist in discorporating three of the four Horseman of the Apocalypse that wasn't. But last time he'd been centered among a rambunctious group of eleven year olds he'd been pelted with birthday cake and miracling an unfortunately fated dove back to life. The angel would rather not risk staining his coat, tip top shape indeed!

Aziraphale smiled seeing a new member join the fun as a red bellied snake with black scales slithered through the forest brush. Dog spun around excitedly in a circle with a tail wag at the friendly intruder, as Crowley joined the pint size French-make that British-Revolution. The serpent, Pepper, and Brian defending their makeshift blockade against Adam, Wensleydale and Dog's advancement up the dirt hill.

The 'battle' coming to an end only when lunchtime rolled around, Anathema offered the Them lemonade and sandwiches. 

"You're welcome to have some too if you like," The young witch offered the angel whom watched the children scampered inside. Slowly the snake slithered over, the scaling shape enlarging and morphing until the fiery haired demon stood in its place. 

"Sounds delightful my dear, but I'm afraid Crowley and I had made reservations for this afternoon." The tartan clad angel politely declined.

"New sushi bar in Soho," Crowley replied flatly. 

"They advertised this remarkable dish accompanying soybean and dashi of all concoctions!"

"As long as long the food doesn't move," The demon called, heading toward the Bentley. "Besides, been awhile since we checked in."

Since the Apocanope the days had blissfully rolled by without any tedious reports to Heaven or exaggerated memos for Hell to send. 

Aziraphale's bookshop had stood for over two hundred years in Soho and he wasn't about to sell or close shop any time soon-especially when Adam had been so kind as to restore it that first Sunday. Originally the only reason Crowley still held his flat was due to lack of ambition and pure laziness to move his houseplants and the odd couple of valuable he possessed-laziness at it's best having not even the will power to use a simple miracle. But often the angelic demonic duo teetered back and forth on where they stayed for days on end. 

The demon did possess a large bed that was pleasant both on the nights they Made an Effort and when the cold blooded redhead needed a warm angel to snuggle-of course Crowley denied this with a muffled grumble and said he was just resting his eyes against Aziraphale's abdomen. More often than not though the pair could be found at the bookshop, normally too much clutter for Crowley's taste. But the nest of bookshelves and finely labelled and cared for literature was the angel's safe space. And the small sofa was the perfect place to coil up and soak up the sunlight. 

Aziraphale smiled with blissful content, watching Crowley swagger his hips in his carefree manner down the gravel.

"Mr. Fell?" The angel blinked, glancing down at the mop of brown golden hair.

"Oh! Hello Adam." 

"Are you and Mr. Crowley having lunch?" The antichrist asked, sipping on a glass of lemonade.

"We were just about to head out actually, but it was a delight seeing you all again."

"Ok, Mr. Crowley's really fun." Adam said, glancing toward the vintage car and the demon sauntering toward the driver's door. "He should come over more when we come up with new games, I didn't know he could be a snake, that's wicked!"

Aziraphale chuckled, "He's quite good at shooing away customers the wily old serpent. It's quite unnerving some of these people! Actually insisting on coming in the shop and buying something, I mean really..."

"Have you two ever wanted kids?"

The angel's words fell short, not understanding how the conversation switched over to this so suddenly.

"Dear boy I-I beg your pardon?" He sputtered.

Adam shrugged, "Mr. Crowley is always nice to us when you guys drop in, and Pepper normally doesn't like grown ups much. But he's cool, just seems like a dad. But a cool dad, and you always want to make sure we're ok and don't get into scrapes. You even offered to help Brian and Wensleydale with their history paper." 

"Well I mean really, I did have first hand account during the Spanish Inquisition. Quite brutish and unpleasant if you ask me. Hard to believe the humans actually thought it up themselves."

"So..." The boy trailed off.

"So what?"

"Why don't you have kids of your own? Would they have wings like you guys did in the desert? Could they turn into snakes too like he can?"

Aziraphale felt his cheeks grow warm. Just what were they teaching kids in school nowadays?

Granted angels were created sexless, they could however surpass this if they put in The Effort that is-and Aziraphale as beet red as he would be to admit he had several times over now. And demons, well they were of the same stock and Effort was not so difficult a feat for them to accomplish-again to which Crowley had.

But even if Effort was put in, it just wasn't a possibility for the pair. 

"I'm afraid it just isn't how we work you see Adam. Physically we can't, I just know Crowley does indeed have a soft spot for children. He was quite good with another young boy we... oversaw for quite some time. But I mean, surely school teaches you about that kind of stuff? Or your parents talking about the bees and buzzards?"

"Bees and birds I think is what Mrs. Laythorn called it, her class was pretty boring. But you guys aren't human, can't you do some kind of angel magic to do it?"

The two stared down the driveway hearing a honk from the Bentley. Crowley with a hand lazily draped over the wheel. Aziraphale was sure the demon had an impatient look from behind those sunglasses.

"I'm sorry dear boy, were it my choice... well I wouldn't be oppose to the idea of a child. And to speak openly, as much as Crowley would likely deny it, I know he isn't one to say no to kids. But even still despite whatever feelings we hold on the matter, it just isn't an option we have Adam. Even angels and demons are limited."

Another two honks.

"I should go, we do have reservations and that dreaded highway is going to be horrid to sit through."

"Bye Mr. Fell," Adam waved as with a strive in his step the angel walked down to the car. While the boy couldn't hear what Crowley was saying, the demon was likely badgering the principality on what had taken him so long to end the conversation and get a wiggle on.

Adam frowned watching the car speed down the dirt road, the muffled music on the radio fading into the distance. It really wasn't fair in the antichrist's mind that they couldn't have kids. Aziraphale and Crowley seemed like perfect dads'-of course if Adam wasn't including his own dad in that statistic, even if he did ground the boy when they left the airbase. If they had a kid it could be someone to teach to do those miracles that they did, make things appear out of thin air, maybe even change into a snake like Crowley could. But if it was partly an angel the snake would be bright and hold a sort of luminous glow the way Aziraphale's own angelic energy gave off. 

It wasn't right that they couldn't, the angel demon duo should be able to have a kid! After they helped Adam save the world it's the least they deserved, and something he knew they actually wanted. 

But the boy wondered just how that kind of child would come to be if not the natural way of things.

"What do you think Dog?" He asked his loyal friend.

The Hellhound turned terrier gave a whine and let out an encouraging bark to his young master. 

Adam smiled rubbing behind the canine's ear, "That's what I was thinking too."

Finishing the last gulp of his lemonade, the antichrist could practically see it as he joined the Them inside for another sandwich.


	2. The Yolks on You

Crowley woke up feeling sore and drained, he hadn't felt this tired since the night he and Aziraphale returned from the airbase. Little miracles here and there weren't overbearing but stopping time had taken an exhausting toll. 

But of the events of the current night before, he had done none too strenuous or exhausting. After their sushi lunch, he and Aziraphale had spent the remainder of the day in the bookshop, a light snogging here, a cuddle there-again Crowley corrected the angel with a pout saying he just needed the body heat, Aziraphale humored the demon in denial. 

After a few hours partaking in wine, music, and Crowley poking fun at the angel's dance moves or lack thereof-save for the Gavotte-he agreed that he would have to return to the flat. If the demon didn't check on the houseplants, who would make sure they stayed in line and flourished? And once they'd been thoroughly misted and given an aggressive 'pep talk' he'd retired to bed.

He blinked-or at least would have if Crowley had eyelids. Of course Crowley could rest in his serpent form, but it wasn't often he changed his shape in his sleep. He had gone to bed in his human shape, but woken up in his snake form. Tasting the air, nothing seemed out of the ordinary, no cause of threat or concern.

Morphing back, Crowley was still curled up as he had been a snake. Running a hand through his hair, the demon rose up, leaning back to stretch only to feel something bump his side. His yellow eyes lazily glanced down and widened in pure surprise at just what had nudged him.

\--

The phone rang just before A. Z Fell and Co opened. Aziraphale had just had his fingers curled around the sign from closed to open. 

With a sigh, the angel let go of the sign. "Really? Can't even wait for me to open, can they?"

The sign could wait another minute or two as he walked over to the phone, gingerly sipping a fresh mug of cocoa as his hand lifted the reciever.

"A. Z Fell Antiquarian and Unusual Books-" He patiently greeted. 

"AZIRAPHALE!"

The angel yelped jumping back as demonic energy pulsated from the phone line. A familiar red headed demon materializing from the device, looking albeit just as flustered. 

"Crowley!" Aziraphale gaped, "You could have warned me first! I almost spilled my cocoa dear boy!"

"Angel," The demon's lips were pursed in a frown.

Composing himself the angel's gaze softened. "My dear, what's the matter? You look like you've had quite a fright."

Crowley made a disgruntled squeak, earning an even more puzzled expression from the angel. 

"Crowley? What's wrong?" 

Rather than tell him, the demon showed him. He carefully pulled each one out of his bulging jacket pockets-Aziraphale having not noticed this in his earlier shock. 

On the mahogany desk beside the full mug sat three large eggs. Much too large to be that of a chicken. 

"Just..." Aziraphale blinked staring down at the eggs, "Where did you get these?"

The demon swallowed a lump in his throat. "I went to bed last night, and woke up to this."

"You mean-?" Aziraphale sputtered. "Are you saying you lay eggs??"

"No! I mean I never have!"

"But they must be yours, I mean you were a snake. Can't you tell if you laid them?"

"How the Heaven should I know Angel?! It's never happened before! I just woke up and was coiled around them."

"Are they... You don't suppose something is..." The angel hesitantly brought a hand down to ever so slightly stroke one of the eggs. Just barely grazing it, Aziraphale gasped jumping back as a rush pulsated through him. 

"Wha- What is it?!" The demon asked, flinging his glasses down on the desk. 

Holding a hand to where his corporation's heart would be Aziraphale's chest heaved. Just a gentle caress, a single touch and he felt it. 

Love, from something so small and yet radiating within the egg, an enormous pang of love.

"It is alive, they are!" Aziraphale said, "I felt it. And already they can love!"

Crowley shook his head, "Just how can this be possible? Are they snakes? Demons? Angels?"

Aziraphale's brows furrowed, "I'm afraid I can't say. All I know is something is alive in there, and they give off so much love my dear. It's remarkable."

Crowley watched the angel stroke each and every egg, smiling warmly at them. 

"I still want to know just how this happened." The demon sat in the adjacent chair, chewing his on his lower lip. Now they had... whatever it was growing inside the eggs to take care of. And with just no idea how or where to start.

"Well, regardless of what they are we need to take care of them, the poor dears are going to get cold!" 

Crowley shrugged, there was a pet shop down the way. But seeing the way Aziraphale coddled the eggs he knew there would be no separating the angel from what was growing inside. 

"Why don't we take the kids on a little field trip Angel," Crowley reached over for his glasses. "If they are snakes we can put them in an enclosure. If not, still won't hurt whatever they are."

"Crowley..." Aziraphale asked in a hushed tone, still gently rubbing is fingers along the last egg. "Do you think we helped make them somehow? They just radiate so much love and they must barely be developed at this stage."

"I'm not sure,"

"Do you think they'll like me?"

Cowley's yellow slit eyes softened The demon's hand that was reaching for his sunglasses slid over to gently wrap around the principality's.

"That's a stupid question angel," In any other tone it would be insulting, but Crowley spoke with a gentle mumble. "Of course they will. Knowing your luck. How could anyone hate you?"

"Well Gabriel didn't seem to like me that much it seems," The principality frowned.

"Hey, don't think about goody goody Gabe, the Heaven does that stuffy suited archangel know? Wouldn't know a good angel if it bit his ass."

Seeing the angel's frown, Crowley tried to lighten the mood. "Think about it, they'll probably have your eyes."

Aziraphale's lips curled in a smile, "Oh Crowley, but I do so love your eyes. It would be wonderful if they looked like you."

"Maybe one of them then."

"I did always admire your hair,"

"Careful Angel, sounds like envy." The demon snicked. 

"You wily old serpent!" Aziraphale shook with a snicker, "But your hair was so lovely long."

"Maybe in another decade or two I'll grow it out again."

"That would be delightful!"


	3. Strength in Numbers

The bell of the bookshop rang as the door swung open. Aziraphale was relieved however to see it was Anathema, her witchfinder boyfriend in tow. 

The angel stepped out from where he was arranging a new first edition he'd acquired from an aging woman in Oxford. 

"Ah! Madame Device and lovely to see you again Mr. Pulsyfer"

"Pulsifer," Newt sheepishly corrected.

"My apologies," Aziraphale politely nodded. "You got my message I trust? Crowley insisted I get one of those dreadful smartphones, and I can't seem to get the hang of it and all these flashing buttons. Really what's wrong with numbers and nothing else on a telephone."

The witch nodded, "I did. I was a little confused, you said you two made eggs? I thought you were just talking about breakfast at first."

"Not quite," The principality gave a wiggle of his sides, turning to a table that he had had to clear for a large glass enclosure. 

Already Anathema was just wrapping her head around the concept of angels and demons, but then again they had averted the end of the world and even Satan himself. 

This however was something else.

The two stepped closer to the glass enclosure. They could see among the branches and moss a giant black serpent, coiled around three large eggs. It appeared to be asleep, but still had a protective hold over the clutch of eggs. 

"That's quite a snake!" Newt gaped, "It's not dangerous?"

"That isn't a snake," Anathema stated, "Not a natural one that is."

The demon's aura gave him away, not that he was trying to hide. 

"Oh yes, sorry." Aziraphale tapped on the glass, "My dear, they're here."

While the snake didn't have eyelids, the yellow orbs did seem to lighten up in recognition as it woke up. Lifting the door open, he serpent slithered out, tasting the air. Newt gave Anathema's hand a squeeze, slightly fearful of the massive snake. 

Slinking around Aziraphale, the snake's shape morphed into Crowley's familiar black clad shape. 

"OH!" Newt wide eyed stared.

"Glad you could join us," Crowley greeted sleepily rubbing his eyes. "What's the occasion and the reason for waking me up Angel?"

"I asked Ms. Device to come over to observe the... Eggs." He had nearly said 'Children'. Then again who was to say that was inaccurate?

Anathema nodded, "Can I hold them?"

Nervously, Aziraphale gave a wiggle of his sides. "I suppose so. Oh but do be gentle please."

Carefully the witch reached in the enclosure and reached for one of the eggs. Carefully she pulled it out, holding it with both palms. Her eyes closed and dipping her head she opened them, tracing a finger down the shell.

"Strange," She said, tilting her head curiously. 

"What?" Crowley raised a brow in confusion. 

"It's aura is big. Nowhere near as big as Adam's mind you, but it's powerful whatever it is."

"So what's the verdict? Angel? Demon? Aardvark?"

Anathema shook her head. "It's weird. It's not like either of your auras. Well it is, but it's like your demonic and angelic auras fused to exist in some kind of new power."

The angel reached for the egg, impatient and worrisome to keep it separate from it's siblings. "There's never been a known record in Heaven of a hybrid."

Crowley shrugged, "I never poked around in Hell's filing cabinets-too boring and dirty in there, that's Dagon's dank little office. But if there were some kind of mix breed we would have heard about it, secrets don't last down there."

The witchfinder was confused as ever. Certainly eggs was not the way he was told procreation worked. Though then again was this really the strangest thing he'd heard since that summer Saturday?

"Perhaps it's best neither side know about this my dear," Aziraphale cautioned, gentling placing the egg back under the heat lamp with the others. "You saw how desperate they were to make poor Adam try and restart Armageddon."

"They won't sssssstep or ssssso much as ssssset a foot near them." Crowley hissed with a scowl, his sunglasses had drooped down his nose revealing his yellow serpent eyes in angry, narrow slits. "Gabriel tries anything I'll rip off his wings and make a nice cushion with the feathers."

Newt gulped nervously taking a step back from the demon.

"We're on our own side my dear boy, they said they would leave us alone." Aziraphale grasped the demon's hand, interlocking their fingers. "We'll be safe, all of us. I may not have my flaming sword anymore, but that doesn't mean I'd let anything hurt our family."

At this Crowley snapped out of his rage fit, giving the angel's hand a gentle squeeze. 

Our family. They were going to be a family.

"All the same, just be careful." The witch warned. Glancing at her wrist she tugged on Newt's sleeve "We should get going if we're going to catch the matinee."

At this the witch finder gave a quirky smile, the date night-date day in this case-was his idea. Wasn't as exciting as saving the world from certain doom mind you, but Anathema seemed really interested in seeing the movie-the irony was not lost on either of them that it was a post apocalyptic drama.

\--

"Adam, where are we going?" Brian asked as the Them walked down the busy streets of Soho. 

"To pay our friends a visit," The antichrist stated, as if it were obvious.

Normally four eleven year olds would have next to no chance boarding the train from Tadfield to London, but as if by some other worldly power, the conductor paid the children-nor Dog for that matter-any mind at all. 

"A bookstore? Looks boring to me," Pepper frowned as they approached the bookshop.

"Actually, I read a very interesting book the other day," Wensleydale stated, "It was about ring tailed lemurs."

Adam stepped through the threshold first, his hellhound turned terrier loyally at his side. While much of Hell had melted away from Dog, the mix of heavenly and demonic scents was very overwhelming to his senses. 

"We're closed!" Crowley called from the loft. Hearing the patter of feet scatter throughout the bookshop he frowned, rather annoyed. Didn't Aziraphale lock up the shop before he stepped out of the shop?

With a groan, Crowley shot up from the unmade bed and made his way downstairs. 

He had expected some annoying family of three or bickering old women huddled around a first edition. 

The demon had not expected the antichrist, three human children, and a former hellhound.

"Hello Mr. Crowley!" Adam waved, Dog gave a whine followed by a bark in greeting.

"Hey, Tadfield become too boring? Stirring up some trouble in Soho next you lot?" He asked, partly in jest.

"I wouldn't say trouble. Actually it's quite crowded in London." Wensleydale answered, putting away a book back on it's shelf having lost interest.

"Make a fair point, if a human were behind the wheel the Bentley would be impossible to drive around here." The demon agreed. 

"That's stupid," Pepper said, "Why bother making a roadway if all there's going to be is a bunch of adults crowding around each other on the street."

"Why indeed," Turning back to Adam Crowley asked. "I imagine you didn't come to London to look at some dusty old books."

Of course Crowley would never say this in front of Aziraphale for the following two reasons:

1\. The principality angel took great care in keeping his collections organized and dust, dirt, and grime free.

2\. If Crowley slandered Aziraphale's books in front of him in such a manner, he would have to endure the angel's quivering upper lip. And that was quite unbearable to witness.

"No, wanted to see you guys, all of you." Adam shrugged.

Crowley's serpent eyes quirked at this, "All of us?"

"Them too!" The boy pointed at the glass enclosure. Since the eggs came to be, either the angel or demon would constantly keep watch in the bookshop. Whichever stayed to watch them-should Aziraphale become peckish or Crowley needing to water his plants-an angelic or demonic miracle would be set in place around the enclosure. Never knew should Heaven or Hell change their minds and come a knocking. 

But the miracle seemed moot for the antichrist as Adam's hands were pressed against the glass.

"Just like what Mr. Martin said." He gaped, watching the still bundle of eggs.

"What?" Crowley asked.

"Mr. Martin lives down the road. Weird but he owns lots of snakes. Showed me this cool book when I asked if snakes lay eggs."

Crowley caught his sunglasses as they fell off his face, nearly hitting the ground.

"You did this didn't you?!" He pointed accusingly. How could he not have realized? The boy was for the most part human yes. However, despite denouncing his father no longer in Heaven, Adam still possessed some of his powers and some influences on reality. 

The door dinged again as Aziraphale walking backward inside, with his hands full carrying three pink cardboard boxes.

"I didn't mean to take so long! I just couldn't decide which one of those flavors to select." The angel rambled. "So Jenny the delightful young lady working the counter, recommended chocolate, mint, or banana. I couldn't decide so I got one of each, lovely girl! She's working in the bakery to support herself through medical school, it's-"

He finally paused mid ramble to take in the gathering in what he had thought would be a quiet and closed bookshop. 

"Oh dear," Aziraphale blinked. "Care to catch me up Crowley?"


	4. I Want to Break Free

It'd been two weeks since the eggs had come to existence, as if by a miracle. While the angel was quite happy with this unexpected blessing, it in part benefited the bookshop. By that being customers became immediately entranced by the habitat and it's unborn occupants and forgot about even buying a book. Crowley of course never allowed any onlookers to get too close, giving a warning hiss every so often.

In fairness this too helped shoo out more customers as well so who was Aziraphale to complain?

And at every opportunity he could, the angel coddled and caressed the warm shells. Aziraphale could feel the life and love that pulsated from them, some days he would read to them, talk despite knowing whatever was inside likely couldn't hear or comprehend his words.

Aziraphale liked to think they favored his readings of Shakespeare, of course Crowley only permitted the comedies.

"If I can't stomach hearing the gloomy ones, I'm sure my spawn feel the same way," The demon said.

"Well I like to think as they are both of ours it would seem, perhaps they have a finer ear as I do."

The demon sighed, "...Hamlet, that's it. No croney witches or star crossed lovers, Angel. I mean it."

Aziraphale smiled, "Your father really is an old softie."

He continued rambling to the warm egg in his palms, "He likes to pretend he isn't nice, but I just know deep down he really is quite a good person. You'll love him, I'm sure you'll take after him. Though you however I'd like to think may take after me. Never be afraid to say what's on your mind, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. It's ok to cry, but you can always come talk to me if somethings upsetting you, I promise."

Setting this egg back in the enclosure he held a new one. 

"You on the other hand, I just know you'll be like your father. Wily and mischievous, but kindhearted. It would be quite lovely if the two of you looked alike, like father like son. But don't feel obligated to Make an Effort! It's ok if you're uncertain, none of you need to decide right away if you don't want to."

And of course Aziraphale could not leave the last one, the largest of the three out. 

"I'm sure you'll be a delightful blend, have a palette and fine taste that I can share with somebody. I know a lovely little place-Crowley found it actually-they make the most heavenly Crepes. And something tells me that you'll quite enjoy Crowley's plants, perhaps you can care for them together! Though I hope you'll be a little kinder to the poor dears than he is. They really are trying their best."

The angel frowned. 

"I know we shall have to explain our respective... well ex respective offices to you all when you're older. But we can get into that another time, you all can be whatever you want to be. Our side is very accepting of that."

Aziraphale smiled, "I can't wait to meet you all my dears."

The angel set the egg back in the enclosure hearing the kettle whistle. Getting up to prepare a nice steaming cup of tea, the principality failed to notice how much more the eggs had seemed to swell. From inside one of the unborn miracles pushed against it's protective shell, bumping into its' sister egg. 

\--

"Crowley! Crowley!" 

"Eugghhh...?" The red haired demon rolled over, trying to go back to sleep. Aziraphale shook him again-and narrowly dodged a cushion aimed for his face.

"My dear boy please, up!" The angel firmly demanded, "It's important!"

Yellow eyes gleamed in the dark, scowling back at him. "What?"

"The eggs!" 

"Did you wake them up too?" Crowley sleepily groaned, diving back into his pillow.

"You daft demon, they're hatching!"

Crowley shot up at this, rubbing the crustiness of sleep from his eyes. 

"What do-? Are you sure? It's only been couple a weeks?" Crowley shoved away the tartan patterned sheets.

"Quite, one of them is cracked! And another one is wiggling about in the moss. The dears are trying to get out Crowley, we should be there for them."

The demon nodded, "Right."

Still in their respective nightwear-Aziraphale's two piece baby blue pajamas complete with fuzzy slippers, and Crowley very casual in a sleeveless black shirt, and maroon shorts-the duo stepped down to the dimly lit bookshop below the loft. They hunched over the glass, watching nature-angelic, demonic, or both-run its course.

Indeed the angel was right, already one of the eggs bulged with a crack pushing out of the shell. Another had teetered over and continued to wiggle, the tiny resident trying hard to break free. The last barely nudged, as though it were patiently pacing itself to break out and join the outside world. 

"Should we help?" The angel asked with concern.

"Not now, it's too early." Crowley cautioned. But he peered down into the enclosure. "You can do it. You are not going to give up, don't even think about it."

With a nervous smile Aziraphale knelt down, "He means that with the warmest affection dears. I know you can do it, but please don't strain yourselves my darlings."

For several minutes the angel and demon were crouched over the enclosure staring down at the eggs. Already sunrise was peaking outside, but Aziraphale had no intention of opening the shop at such an intimate moment.

Aziraphale gasped, finally seeing one of the babies break through enough, the shell caving in on its' force. 

The tiniest little snout peaked out of the gaping hole of the egg. 

"Oh Crowley!" The principality was beaming, absolutely starstruck. 

The tiny snake tasted the air, itty bitty forked tongue flicked out considerably. Enough wiggle room after another push and the small creature slithered free. 

Crowley was speechless, watching the tiny being slither about. It was quite tiny, no longer than a string bean. Yet it was like looking at a miniature version of him, black body and red belly, the smallest of yellow eyes mirrored back at him. 

The snake flicked its tongue out lifting it's snout to better look up at Crowley. 

"Oh! He already knows his daddy," Aziraphale warmly beamed, "He looks just like you"

Careful not to disturb the other eggs still in the process of joining their sibling, Crowley reached in and let the newborn slowly slither into his palm.

"Good job little man," Crowley congratulated the offspring. 

In response the snake tasted the air, only just born and the demon's scent was already so familiar to it. 

While Crowley was busy coddling their firstborn, Aziraphale was focused on the snout the popped out and back into it's shell.

"No need to feel shy! We're quite nice." The angel ignored Crowley's hiss at the N word. 

This one took much longer to escape its first home, in the meantime the other snake had made such an impact breaking free that the shell practically peeled opened. 

Another serpent emerged, only this one was in high contrast to its darkly scaled sibling. The snake's scales were a striking white that seemed to shine in the light of the coming sunrise seeping through the windows. It's red belly however gave it away as the two being related. A piece of shell had caught on the newborn's head, as it desperately tried shaking it off.

"Oh! Let me help you," The angel cooed. He almost didn't notice a second white scaled slither up his finger. The little one had silently slunk out when it had made a fresh dent in the egg whilst the parents were busy with the second child's hatching.

"Hello there," Aziraphale smiled at the small serpent coiled around his thumb. This one was noted to have white scales, however a golden shone belly, and eyes that twinkled a crystal blue. "Didn't I tell you you would take after me? You're quite beautiful my dear."

So distracted by the flashes of love, Aziraphale had nearly forgotten about the flailing sibling whom quite literally had egg on its face.

"I'll do it," Crowley said, one hand still cradling the dark scaled snake as his free hand reached in to flick he eggshell off the newborn's head. 

The demon's hand had frozen in place when the infant serpent blinked up at him. Neither of it's eyes were crystal blue or amber yellow. These eyes gleamed green, triggering memories of a vibrant forest and flourish that Crowley once cared for when he went by another name. A name he'd not heard in a long time. 

"Arern't they wonderful Crowley?" Aziraphale sighed, absolutely high off the love the newborn snakes radiated on their new parents. 

"Crowley?" He asked not hearing an answer, his eyes softened in confusion seeing a lost look in the demon's eyes. "Crowley, my dear?"

"Hm?" The redhead looked up as though awoken from a dream. "Sorry Angel, I was somewhere else."

The green eyed serpent tasted the air, booping it's snout against Crowley's finger. Perhaps slightly jealous he was the only one not being held. 

"Oh alright, come on." Crowley nodded, as without another moment it intertwined itself around said finger before curling up in his palm.

"What should we name them?" Aziraphale asked. "It's quite silly we haven't considered names for them before."

"And you think I haven't?" 

"Well I meant together. Certainly I've considered some promising names. But I have a feeling you won't like them..."

Crowley gave the angel a side eye. "Come on now Angel, how bad could they be?"

His blue eyes beamed in excitement, "Well! If you're really interested, I was quite fond of Oscar-"

"Absolutely not!"

"I told you you would hate it," Aziraphale pouted.

"We are not naming one of our children after your past flame!"

"He was not a past flame you wily old fiend! I'll have you know any tempting suggestions he had made my way I politely declined. His works are the only sort of passion I partook in."

"Right..."

"What about William then?"

"I miracled his passion project a hit for you, I'm not giving that hack's memory anymore than that." 

Aziraphale was tight lipped, having two strikes on names he'd taken fancy. 

"Anthony then?"

Crowley blinked, "Really? You actually liked that name?"

"Obviously! I told you that night I didn't say I didn't, just that it would take some getting use to."

With his uncoiled hand, Aziraphale booped the dark scaled snake's snout. 

"He quite looks like his father after all, and now we'll finally know what the J stands for." Aziraphale wiggled his sides with a chuckle.

Crowley couldn't help but smile, "Did you just make a funny joke?"

"It would seem I did! But I do quite like the name."

His amber eyes met the smaller pair still starstruck by the angelic energy of the gentle boop.

"Anthony Jr, nice ring to that."

Aziraphale's eyes beamed happily. 

"Only two more to go then, this one she's such a darling." The angel remarked at the gold bellied serpent twined around his thumb now.

"She?"

"No wonder the poor dears are so tired, between hatching and Making their own Effort at the start. They must be exhausted." 

"Well..." Crowley mulled over it "If she's a she... Agnes?"

Aziraphale blinked, "Oh? Not what I'd expect to hear from you."

"Assumed I'd suggest Asmodeous?"

"No no my dear boy. I just never thought you'd consider Miss Nutter's namesake. It's quite kind of you."

Crowley sneered at the compliment, feigning disgust at being called such, demons weren't suppose to be called kind-even though as the angel would point out Crowley was not like other demons anymore. "No I just... Just a way of saying thanks for saving our skins is all. Without her we'd be a puddle of sulfur smelling goo and feathery ashes."

While Aziraphale was not comfortable imagining the what if he had been engulfed in Hellfire-and even worse Crowley doused in Holy Water-it was yet another notch in the angel's favor that Crowley really was a good person. 

"Agnes Eve if I may? She does need a middle name too after all, just as little Anthony does."

Crowley nodded. He opened up his hand, the green eyed snake continued tasting the air, wanting to take in everything all at once. 

"Oh, lovely eyes he has," The angel smiled. "Would you like to name him? Or perhaps we could together?"

"Uh yeah, what you got?" The newborn lowered it's head, safe and cozy.

"Well I'm quite partial to that singer you and your car are so fond of! It's bebop yes, but seems to be gradually growing on me. Queen's his name yes?"

Crowley gave a groan, "Queen is his band's name Angel, for Hell's sake! And his name was Freddie Mercury." 

"Oh!"

"Not a bad idea though," He'd had a chance meeting with the singer, though he didn't know this at the time-in part due to Crowley being far too intoxicated and mumbling through dry weeps about him "going too fast" for an angel. It wasn't until he heard a certain song blasting in the Bentley years later that the demon put two and two together. "Still like it."

"And Mercury was quite popular with the Greeks, known to be quite a clever chap in the humans mythology."

"Mercury, that sit right with you?" Crowley asked, the small serpent flicked it's tongue in response coddling closer against his palm. "Think he likes it."

"Splendid, and his middle name?"

"Oh, hadn't given it much thought." The demon babbled.

"Well I'm sure we could-" 

"Maybe later."

Aziraphale quirked a brow in confusion. "But the others have their names. It wouldn't be fair to-"

"I don't have anything ok!?" The demon argued. Anthony hissed at his father with worry why he seemed so distressed.

"Crowley, what's gotten into you?" The angel gently asked.

The demon grumbled. "'S fine, sorry for yelling."

"It most certainly is not fine! Tell me what's wrong?" Aziraphale asked sternly concerned.

"Just I'm the one thinking of a stupid name now."

"Crowley! I hardly imagine it's such, and I'd never be so mean spirited to any suggestions."

"Not you. I just think it is."

"Tell me then, it may make you feel better."

Crowley sighed hard, "R....phh.."

"Crowley," Aziraphale stared him down.

"Fine! Fine, Mercury... Raphael. Happy now?"

Aziraphale's cold stern stare melted away. That name.

"The archangel?" 

Crowley nodded.

"He disappeared shortly before I was assigned to the Eastern Gate. Did you know him? I never met him myself, but I had heard he had... well that he'd fallen during the rebellion." 

"You could say that... I tried forgetting about that name. Haven't heard it for millennia."

"I think it sounds wonderful, and I'm sure dear Mercury here agrees."

His amber eyes stared down at the green ones, now in a dilated state of resting.

"It wouldn't hurt as a middle name would it?" The angel asked hopefully.

"I guess. Guess as a middle name it's ok." Crowley nodded.

The sun's shine seem to reflect the bright horizons awaiting the new family. One could say the way thing's were going to now play out were ineffable. But don't tell Crowley this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The babies are here! Thank you, thank you to all the kind kudos and the lovely comments! I hope to hear more from you guys if you ever drop a comment in the slot <3


	5. Anthony and the Angry Itch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time for some snake babies or betterly christened "snabies" adventures!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you Butlericfy, LethLettuceStuff, Ashenaiulyk, and AofRandD for the lovely comments and to everyone for the amazing kudos! <3
> 
> A brief note that the snake children do hiss everything in snake lingo so what they say will look like 'this' in snake speak (Parseltongue? Don't sue me!) rather than "this" which is normal English speak

Agnes quite enjoyed reading with her Papa Zira-as it was too difficult to hiss the angel's full name. Though she and her brothers knew who their fathers were after they'd hatched, a week later they had to learn names and new words. Words were hard, and sometimes it was difficult to understand their angelic father more. 

Often times she'd slither up and perch on his shoulder, or curling around the warmth of his mug of cocoa and listen to him read aloud.  
Aziraphale was the only one that liked to read to her. Every other person that walked in the shop with a book opened shrieked when she wanted a peak. 

"SNAKE!" A middle aged man shrieked, dropping the book he'd been skimming through.

'I read too?' Agnes hissed confused. But of course the mortal didn't speak snake, so all he heard was more hissy noises. 

"Oh dear, you know now is nap time!" Aziraphale called, reaching down to scoop up the infant snake-offering no assistance to the gaping man whom had fallen on his backside. 

"You- This is one of your pets?!" 

Aziraphale looked as though he'd been thoroughly insulted. "I'll have you know she is a valued member of the family!"

Picking himself up the man huffed, "I shall not entertain a shop that houses wild animals running amok!"

"Technically she slithers and does not run." The angel said, despite the man already storming off.

Turning to the white scaled infant he sighed, "Darling why were you out of bed so late?"

'Want a story Papa Zira,' Agnes hissed. Granted angels did not possess snake dialect-Crowley of course was already quite fluent-but nothing a quick miracle couldn't fix. 

"Alright, I suppose one would suffice. You're already up, what will hurt ten minutes more?"

Agnes flicked out her tongue with glee, she slithered up the hand Aziraphale offered. Walking over to the stairwell the angel skimmed through the shelf. Given he sold-well kept was the better term, very rarely did he sell a book-rare editions and books dating back centuries he was in short supply of children's stories. Though he did have a new turn of fancy for Mark Twain, whereas Crowley considered the American's storytelling too rustic.

The demon on the other hand had taken to miracle copies of Lewis Carroll into the book shop regardless of the edition or publisher. And so sitting across from the open first edition of 'The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn' was a novel (neither first or second edition to Aziraphale's dismissal) illustrating a blonde child in a poofy blue dress. 

As it was Aziraphale's story time with little Agnes, he ignored 'Alice's Adventures In Wonderland'-beside the fact that it still held a bookmark where Crowley and Mercury had left off at yesterday.

\--

"You want to do what?" Crowley asked, sipping from his wine glass. 

"I did promise you, and we have already dined at the Ritz." Aziraphale smiled. "Many lovely dinings now."

"Not that a picnic sounds deplorable-as you have owed me one for the last fifty years-but aren't you forgetting something? Perhaps three somethings?"

"Actually I had considered that." 

"We can't exactly find a babysitter for them."

"Exactly, which is why I suggest they come with us." The angel calmly reasoned, sipping his cocoa. 

Crowley frowned, "I'm not putting them in a stroller."

"Not quite what I had in mind my dear. But now that you mention it-"

"Angel!"

\--

Mercury was coiled up beneath the orange heat lamp, when he peaked his head up feeling a blip of water hit his snout. 

He hissed in frustration, 'What that for?'

'Itch! Itch! Help me!' Anthony groaned, flailing about in the water dish. 

'What's wrong?' Agnes peeked out from her coiled position on a branch. 

'ITCH!' The serpent hissed, squirming and splashing more water. 'Get father!'

Of course Agnes had been reprimanded last time she had escaped and gave a baby blue eyed plead with Mercury to take the heat this time. 

If snakes could sigh, the green eyed serpent certainly would have.

'Fine, I get dad.' 

It seemed like a miracle one would say as to how a snake, even a baby one, could slither out the quite narrow crack between the glass door leading outside to the bookshop.

The shop was dark, long since closed hours ago. The enclosure was the only major light source in the room. 

Mercury slunk down the leg of the table and up the long journey of the stairwell.

He could hear voices, obviously both his fathers were here tonight. Rarely but on short occasion Crowley would have to make a quick departure. Be it a miracle over to the flat for the plants or give the Bentley a spin around the block, as she felt quite neglected since they'd had the babies.

Three empty wine bottles sat carelessly on an end table, a glass housing but a mouthful teetering on the edge of the clustered table. But neither demon or angel intwined in the bed cared too much about the unfortunate glassware's fate. 

The door was ajar, open enough for Mercury to slither in. Brows would quirk if the snake possessed any hearing all of the commotion on the rustling feather tick. 

"Why must you be such a tease Angel?" Crowley mumbled against Aziraphale's shoulder.

"Mmm my dear, please." Aziraphale mumbled, his senses tingling at the gentle touch of Crowley's lips pressing along his skin. "Speak for yourself."

The demon smirked, taking to nibble against the peak toned skin. It was only when he heard persistent hissing did he freeze.

'Daaaaad' Mercury hissed. 'Dad?'

Aziraphale blinked, coming out of his haze as Crowley struggled against blankets to cover up. 

"Oh! Dearest, what are you doing up so late? It's well past bedtime." The angel scolded despite his warm inviting smile. Mercury slithered up onto the duvet. 

'Oooh' The infant snake hissed in delight, 'Soft...'

"Ahem," Crowley cleared his throat, decent enough to pop his head out. "Alright boyo, what's the problem? Couldn't sleep?"

'No, Tony too loud.' Mercury hissed coiling further into the covers. 'Ssssoft'

"Too loud?" The angel asked with concern, "Oh, is he hurt? troubled with nightmares? Do tell us what's the matter."

'He itch, itch real bad. Need dad, dad know?'

Crowley groaned, flipping the covers up. "I was hoping they wouldn't have to go through this until they were a little older."

Crowley stood, only dressed in a pair of charcoal tone shorts.

"Crowley?"

"They're starting to shed." The demon sighed, "It's not a fun process Angel."

"Oh dear! What can we do?"

"Well we can't do much of anything. But I can try and make him more comfortable, I'll check if Agnes has started too."

Aziraphale had expected Crowley to return to bed after a few minutes, but when he awoke the next day the adjacent bed space was still empty. Well this wasn't true, there was a snake under the covers. Only this coiled serpent was green eyed and much smaller than its' father's serpent form. 

Aziraphale smiled down at little Mercury snug bundled in blankets, he allowed the little one to rest for awhile longer in the bed as he prepared to open the bookshop. Agnes was awake and already booping against the glass.

'Papa Ziraaaaa!' She hissed excitedly.

"Good morning my dearest," Aziraphale smiled, but he frowned in concern seeing only one snake in the enclosure. "Pray tell, where is your brother? I know where little Mercury is but I heard poor Anthony was having a predicament."

'Dad take Anthony. Say he'd help.'

"Oh?" Aziraphale hummed, did Crowley take the snake to his flat?

Calmly Aziraphale dialed the apartment on the shop phone.

"Hey this is Anthony Crowley. You know what to do, do it with style!" The angel heard the recording of his beloved demon parrot.

'Daddy?' Agnes asked, hearing her father's voice.

"Oh no no, it's just a message." Aziraphale hung up, placing his glasses on with a confounded expression on his face. 

If only the angel knew. Indeed Crowley was in his flat but too preoccupied at the moment with one of the snake son's to pick up. Anthony groaned, his body writhing uncomfortably. All night Crowley had been using his plant mister to keep the infant's skin cool and damp to soothe the burning sensation. And now he was coiled protectively around the snake, who had taken to laying in the soil of one of the demon's prized house plants. 

Of course Crowley would call Aziraphale back, otherwise what would the angel do without him once the other two's shedding began? The clumsy crepe enthusiast would probably try to peel the skin off like a banana's for Heaven's sake!


	6. An Angel, a Demon, and Three Snabies in St James Park

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I definitely plan to keep this story going for awhile! Thank yous for all the lovely kudos and the comments last chapter Corrosive_Cyanide, and Little_porkchop <3

It was three months after the snake triplets hatching that the angel and demon finally got their long awaited picnic. 

Aziraphale insisted the kids accompany them, refusing to leave them at the bookshop. So Crowley found himself looking for a slightly smaller enclosure to carry them down to the park in. 

Only Aziraphale had other ideas.

"No, no nope! Absolutely not!" The demon argued, "You've gone too far this time Angel!"

"Oh come now dear boy, I think they'll absolutely enjoy themselves and most importantly stay safe."

"I refuse to go about the park, pushing them about like some sort of nanny."

"With all due respect Crowley, you were Warlock's nanny for over eleven years."

"That was different!"

"Aside from the fact that we are now caring for our own and not the-well what we assumed at the time-antichrist, how is it any different?"

Unable to escape the widening pouty look in the angel's eyes, the old serpent sighed. "Fine, fine we'll use the stroller. But take that massive bow off the top for Hell's Sake."

Crowley wanted to hiss his frustration out at the onlooker gawkers but settled on a death glare upon any unfortunate flower they passed. Though Aziraphale was ever so delighted to push the stroller while the demon carried the picnic blanket and basket. 

"Aw isn't that sweet." A young lady said to her friend. "A lovely day for a family walk"

"It's so nice to see more people coming out, and with a baby too! But I have to say they're total opposites."

"Opposites can attract! Look at Danny and Josh, have you seen how they act? Putting ketchup on sushi yuck!" 

Some people paid them little mind, while two grown men pushing a baby blue stroller-one looking as though he were two centuries behind in fashion and the other pulled off a poster of the Matrix cast-was somewhat perplexing. It was not so much an oddity to gawk at as joggers continued pass them, elderly women fed the local pigeons without so much a glance. 

The only exception to this however were two rowdy young men in tattered jeans and faded logos on their t-shirts. 

They shoved passed Aziraphale, nearly knocking the stroller over-had it not been or the angel's quick snap of fingers halting the freefall. A distressed series of hissing noises emanated from the stroller. 

"I'm so sorry my dears, it was just a- Crowley? Where are you?" Aziraphale paused to glance up at the demon making a beeline for the hooligan duo. 

"Mind you some manners why don't you," Crowley scowled, as one of the teenagers flipped him off.

"Screw you fag!" The rude scraggly haired high schooler hollered as he and his companion ran off. 

But the demon merely smirked, bringing his hand up with a snap. The teenagers shoes simultaneously tied together and they fell over onto their faces. 

"Aw shit!" One of them babbled, "I think I chipped a tooth!"

"Get off me dumbass!" The fairer haired boy groaned, trying to shove his friend off. 

Aziraphale crossed his arms staring at Crowley whom ignored the look and peaked in the stroller. 

"And that kids is how it's done," The demon winked from behind his sunglasses.

"No it most certainly is not!" The angel shook his head. "Do not follow your father's terrible example. Resorting to violence never solved anything."

"Come on Angel! Besides he just chipped one tooth, it's not as though the whole thing was yanked out of his gums."

Inside the blue stroller Anthony hissed in what snake dialect would translate to as a giggle in delight at his serpent like father's actions in dealing with bullies. Might be useful in the future!

\-- 

At the top of the hill, they had found the perfect spot. Aziraphale opened up the hatch to check on the children, all three were nestled in the knitted blanket, an occasional throaty noise in Agnes sleep. 

Crowley was in the process of unfolding the red white patterned blanket, his angelic counterpart inhaled a relieved breath of fresh air. 

"Splendid weather today," Aziraphale happily noted, setting down the basket. 

While the soft middled angel took his time, cozying up to the blanket covered grass, Crowley plopped down with a grunt. 

Aziraphale preferred assembling the picnic the old fashioned way rather than waste a miracle on it-although he'd certainly performed his fair share of frivolous miracles. So gradually the angel and demon removed from the seemingly bottomless basket sandwiches, wine, and snacks in between.

"Goodness dear boy! Did we really need to pack an entire bushel?" He asked, staring at the ripe red apples laying in the basket. 

"An apple a day and all that," Crowley smirked. Taking a descendant of the long ago forbidden fruit from the picnic basket, the demon took a rather slow and savory bite. 

Aziraphale lips curled, knowing full well that Crowley knew full well what he was doing with that alluring snake eyed stare past his sunglasses. A dribble of juice dripped down the redhead's chin, all too tempting for even an angel to resist. 

"You've missed a spot my dear," Aziraphale chuckled, wiping the juice drip with his thumb. 

Crowley's eyes were trained on the angel as he proceeded to stare right back, rather provocatively licking the juice from off his thumb. 

Meanwhile in the carrier, little hissing sounds albeit muffled were heard.

"What's Daddy and Papa doing?" Agnes asked curiously.

"Making cutey eyes at each other again," Anthony replied, trying to wriggle out of the confines of their blanket cocoon.

"Hey!" Mercury groaned, "I was comfortable,"

"I want get out, wanna see dad." Anthony mischievously called, untangling himself as he slithered to the open lip of the stroller. 

"Please Tony, we can't cause trouble," Agnes whined. "Papa Zira said trouble's bad."

"But dad said trouble's fun. It's how he and Papa met."

If snake's had brows, Mercury's would be raised and staring skeptically at his sibling. 

"I don't remember storytime going like that."

But Anthony stopped listening as the pint sized black scaled red bellied serpent plopped onto the open grass. 

"Ooooooh!" He hissed, intrigued by the soft texture of the green blades, combined with the warm sunshine beaming down on his cool scales. 

The infant snake continued exploring, trying to make his journey over to the pair toasting glasses of wine with each other. 

Anthony's yellow eyes beamed seeing movement in the dirt. The slitted orbs were fixated on the creature that scuttled through the grass. 

Unsure what compelled him to do it, Anthony wondered what it tasted like.

\--

Absolutely scrumptious!" Aziraphale sighed, setting his fork and now empty plate down. It had all been scrumptious, between the cucumber sandwiches, the salmon courgette quiche, beetroot hummus amongst a wide spread cuts of veggies and bread. But the peach cobbler was for Aziraphale the culinary highlight of the afternoon. 

Crowley watched his angelic counterpart lean back, rubbing his plump belly. 

"Another glass?" Crowley asked, pouring a refill regardless of the answer. 

"Oh Crowley, I dunno. May need some sobering up first." Aziraphale dozily mumbled.

"C'mon Angel, can't tempt you to just one more?"

"Of course you can, you're a demon. Tempting is what you do. But I can't be tempted into another."

"Half another then?" Tilting his head back Crowley took a long gulp of the wine glass. "Sharing is caring, isn't that one of your lots?"

Aziraphale glanced at the now now half full glass-or half empty if you asked Crowley, relenting to the temptation. 

"Not too sure of that, but if the cleverest of clever angels could make 'You can't have a war without war' that one wouldn't surprise me."

Crowley snorted, "What wither wings came up with that load of bollocks, Michael?"

"Sandalphon actually,"

"Oh yes, Sodom and Gomorrah. Steered clear of that one, think Lord Beez stuck Hastur with that one."

"Nope... no more. No more smite talk here." Aziraphale slurred, quite inebriated.

"Know just the solution to that." 

Sitting up to his feet, Crowley sauntered over to the stroller. 

"Wakey wakey, up for some fresh air?" Crowley peeked in at the wriggling blanket.

"Yesssss!" Agnes hissed happily, white snoot poking out of the knitted cloth.

"Please dad! Please!" Mercury already slithering his dark scaled body out for Crowley's waiting hand.

Agnes followed, but the demon counted only one dark scaly and one white scaly. 

"Tony taking a load off in there?" Crowley asked, assuming the eldest born was still asleep. 

"No!" Mercury hissed.

"You promised not say nothing!" Agnes whined.

"I no promise. Papa said no lies." 

Crowley eyed the infant snakes. "What?"

But his ears could pick up a faint sound within a long bed of grass just down their hill. He tried focusing on that noise, it sounded wild and erratic. But also a faint hiss of confusion. 

"Daddy?" Agnes asked, curling around Crowley's fingers. "We play?"

"Why don't you two play with Papa for a bit? I got to go check out something."

Lowering himself to the blanket, the snakes slithered up to Aziraphale's lap, Mercury cozy up around the chain of the angel's pocketwatch.

"Everything alright dear boy?" Aziraphale asked, entertaining Agnes' hissing with glee. 

"Yeah, just gotta go for a little walk is all, be back in a shake."

Laying in the bare grass, Crowley let his human form slip away, the bones shifting and shrinking until a large black scaled serpent slithered in it's place. 

Crowley's large yellow eyes scanned all around him, heading toward the sounds rustling in the long grass below. 

"Anthony," The king serpent hissed, "Tony"

He could hearing what in snake dialect would be considered alot of groaning and mumbling. 

And slinking up onto a rock, the demon snake understood why. 

Tasting the air, Crowley followed the smells and sounds, the demons senses could give bloodhounds a run for their money.

He'd happened upon Anthony, whom coiled and buried against the remains of an anthill mound, had happened upon something else. 

Crowley would have smirked if snakes could smile, little Anthony Jr was staring tiny yellow specs at three male serpents green brown in color with black rings along their bodies, currently entwined with a fourth. 

"Only three months in and you already got your first peep show?" Crowley asked.

Curling in on himself, Anthony relaxed seeing it was his father. 

"Dad, what they doing?" The infant snake asked, still watching the males coil and knot around the overwhelmed female. 

"Well, they're... getting close and personal with each other." 

"Like playing?" 

"Sure kiddo, like playing."

"I play too!" 

Crowley gave a warning hiss, slithering in the smaller serpent's way. 

"Oh no no no. You don't want to play that game. Only grownups play that kind of game."

Anthony tilting his head curiously, "You and Papa play grownup game?"

Crowley found his words escaping him on how to explain without explaining just what sexual reproduction was. Even if his kids were snakes, they were still juvenile and ignorant to how the world worked. 

The locals were roused to their presence, as the males uncoiled themselves hissing a warning at the red bellied intruders. 

"Really you guys?" Crowley hissed, "You lot got the wrong idea."

The largest of the three tasted the air, slinking closer with a not so friendly spit at Anthony. 

"Dad?" Anthony whimpered, losing some of his courage, curling in around himself.

"Uh uh, you don't do that to my kid!" 

Slithering very up close and personal Crowley bared large fangs at the males much bigger and certainly more intimidating to the local reptilian life. 

Getting the message loud and clear, they made haste in abandoning the site, disappearing into the long grass. 

"I wish I be brave too," Anthony sadly pouted, "Like you are."

Crowley stared back down at the smaller yellow eyes. 

"You'll get there one day, promise you that. Let's get back to Papa, junior." 

Slinking away, Anthony tasted the air, gazing back to see they had a shadow.

"Dad?" Anthony asked, watching the female whom watched Crowley intently. 

Crowley met his gaze and turned to the serpent consistently flicking her tongue out, grey eyes trained on his. 

"I think she likes you dad!" Anthony hissed, "She want you to play?"

If Crowley had the ability to laugh he most certainly would have. 

Albeit rude to interrupt her foursome-though given Crowley was a demon seemed acceptable behavior-he wasn't in any sort of mood for rebound sex. Regardless of how provocative or tempting she was being, he had his own source of angelic temptation to work with. 

"Sssorry toots, appreciate the offer really, but I park my car in another garage." He hissed, slinking back into his human shape, Anthony protectively nestled in his jacket pocket.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The snakes Crowley and Anthony encountered are grass snakes, sometimes referred to as ring snakes or water snakes, common in Europe but not venomous.


	7. I've Got No Scales To Hold Me Down or Make Me Frown

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again to Little_porkchop for the lovely review last chapter and to everyone's kind kudos! I appreciate a review or kudo any day <3

Adam's visits to London were becoming routine over the months that began to gradually pass.

Though when school started the-former-antichrist and his three young cohorts had to limit their trips to Saturdays or Sundays. Of course, today was Thursday, which is why Aziraphale was caught off guard to see a familiar messy mop of hair and the greeting bark of a dog.

"Adam," Aziraphale removed his reading glasses.

"Hello Mr. Fell," The boy greeted, placing the book he was skimming back on the shelf-granted it was placed in the wrong spot but a quick miracle fixed that.

"What an unexpected pleasure!" The angel said with an enthusiastic wiggle. 

"Mom had to see a lady from work that got sick. Said I could come see you and Mr. Crowley if I didn't cause trouble."

"I should hope trouble is the last thing on your mind." Aziraphale joked but on the one hand did hope little to no mischief was in the antichrist child's head. 

Adam shrugged, "Not really, don't feel like going on any adventures without Pepper, Wensley, and Brian."

The boy got down on his knees, leaning against the large table holding the triplets enclosure.

"I thought two of them were black? Like Mr. Crowley." He asked, watching two white snouts boop the glass-Anthony was in the process of cornering an unfortunate cricket that had become trapped.

"I had imagined so too when they were born yes, but dear Mercury seems to be testing his abilities."

When Agnes and Anthony shed, all was normal but Mercury whether he knew it or not had other plans. It startled the angel demon pair at first seeing what was white scales give way to a fresh skin that was ashen black, the next cycle of shedding he had blotches of white coating his scaly body against the black. It wasn't known what was causing it or if the discolored shedding would ever stop, but for the last two months that had passed, the small serpent had been shedding white as a lily. 

"Do you want some tea Adam?" Aziraphale asked, "I hadn't expected company, but I can put the kettle on in a pinch."

"Ok."

Opening the latch, the snabies were set loose, the triplets enjoyed when Adam and his friends came over to play. 

"Hi Adam!" Agnes happily hissed with a twitch of her head.

"And Dog too! Wanna try a cricket?" Anthony flicked out his tongue, uncoiling himself.

"Where others?" Mercury hissed, scanning around the empty bookshop. 

"Still in Tadfield, mom just dropped me off." Adam answered, he didn't want any language barriers between them finding it rude he couldn't understand snake dialect. And like that, miraculously he could talk to snakes-Wensleydale said it reminded him of a book he read about a boy wizard in London. 

"Say, when can we play when you guys are human?" The antichrist asked as if he were asking how the weather was today.

"Human?" Mercury asked.

"We can be humans?" Anthony flicked his tongue out again.

"I can read more books with human hands!" Agnes cheered. 

"How we do that?" The color shifting serpent questioned.

Adam shrugged, "Must be something you just do. Mr. Crowley can do it."

"Maybe daddy can show us," Agnes beamed.

"Can't be too hard, seems only fair you guys should be able to if he can. Not sure if Mr. Fell can change into anything."

Dog broke the conversation with a whine, pawing at the front door of the bookshop. 

"Sorry Dog, I'll be right back you guys."

With a clip of a small leash-even though there was no chance the former Hellhound would stray from Adam's side-the boy took Dog outside for some well needed relief. 

In the meantime, the snake children hissed among themselves. 

"Human! How amazing," Mercury said.

"Imagine all the fun!" Anthony jeered.

"Fun? When you say fun, that mean trouble not fun."

"Trouble can be fun."

"We could play more in the sun."

"And all the books!" Agnes added in.

"There's more fun than books," Anthony shook his head

All the while Anthony was going on about all the mischievous 'fun' they could do with human bodies. Mercury was quite interested in this idea, seeing his fathers dine together, nap wrapped around each other-well Crowley napping and Aziraphale quietly reading with demons limbs wrapped around his torso. So much he wanted to know how it felt that he just couldn't feel with scales and no limbs. 

So naturally the multi color changing sibling would be most interested in making this a reality.

Or rather making reality bend to this wish.

\--

The flash of lightening was a bright eye piercing blast to any that beheld it. Fortunately the only people whom had witnessed it were from a safe distance in the park. And the archangel that had manifested willed away the sight as a mere influx with a stray power line in the mortals minds. 

Gabriel straightened his jacket, "Lovely night, good night for fellow humans to be outside?"

A girl on her cellphone gave the archangel a puzzled look before strutting away. 

Casually as he could, Gabriel glanced around.

The ethereal man swatted away a stray fly buzzing around him. And this followed another.

By the third or fourth Gabriel finally understood the message. 

"I'd thought you were running late," The archangel remarked to the figure shadowed under a leafy green tree.

"Says the one who izzz late," Beelzebub remarked. "Angels, no sense of time."

Fiddling with the ends of his scarf, Gabriel glanced around. "I should hope this meeting holds some valuable purpose. Lets have it."

The Prince of Hell teetered from side to side, "Have you... heard anything regarding the Great Plan?" 

Gabriel shook his head, "Did we not already come to the conclusion that the Great Plan was inverted by the Ineffable Plan? A complete bust and waste of paperwork."

Beelzebub gave the archangel a sideways glance, "So you didn't feel it?"

Gabriel's violet eyes stared in perplexed confusion. "Felt...?"

"Something, not certain what it wazzz. But something has changed."

"The antichrist child by chance?"

They shook their head, a buzz of flies circling their head while doing so. 

"No, the disobedient adversary wasn't the cause of thizz." 

The archangel considered this news, perhaps some poking through Earth's observation files might do some good. Of course there was one other alternative.

"Is it possible our... problematic cases may be involved?"

"As per our Lord and Master's demands, the demon Crowley is no longer Hell's concern."

The Prince of Hell took to leave out how Lucifer was still moping about in Hell over being disowned by his own son that day on the airbase. So grief stricken by this betrayal, the former Morningstar-to put it bluntly and in his own words-gave no flying fucks over one disobedient demon gallivanting on Earth. 

"While not directly said by the Almighty Herself-much to my dismay-the Metatron on Her behalf has come to a similar conclusion regarding Aziraphale and leaving him to his early retirement. But it might be worth a look?"

Beelzebub considered this, "Perhaps. Why don't we stay in touch about this matter? Between just uzz?"

Gabriel considered this, it could spread a panic if he told Uriel, certainly Sandolphon, and any of the others about this. "Agreed, for now that is."

Swatting at another stray fly, the Prince of Hell glared at the archangel. 

"He hit me first," Gabriel noted, pointing an accusing finger at the insect that seemed to buzz even louder.

\--

Mercury was anxious to try the human thing. 

It would make outings with their fathers so much easier with the use of their own legs. And when Adam and the Them wanted to come over they could play just like human kids did. 

That wasn't to say being a snake didn't have it's benefit or enjoyment to it. They had much fun slithering up the bookshelves, Anthony to Papa Zira's disapproval enjoyed spooking customers in the bookshop-though Aziraphale was in part happy it stopped people from buying the books but he would never admit this.

Not to mention sleepovers at the flat, Mercury enjoyed coiling up around the lush leaves and vines of father's plants. But if he had human arms and hands he could help water the plants and encourage them-at least that's what Crowley called it. 

Agnes especially enjoyed bedtime, sometimes Papa Zira would quietly scoop her up and read her an extra story in his big-and quite delightfully soft-bed in the upstairs loft. 

Adam said it should be possible, and why couldn't it be?

Mercury flicked his tongue out, thinking long and hard. He was slinking across the floor rug of the bookshop, into an expanse of sunlight. 

His green slit eyes felt heavy, his reptilian body craving rest in the basking warmth. 

Dreams were one of the things Mercury enjoyed most, it made sense why his father loved sleep. 

It was full of the usual lot of course, the smell of open books aged over centuries, sunlight pouring in warm and bright through a windowsill, the shaky tremor of a frightened houseplant with vibrant green leaves.   
Mercury loved wrapping around the plants, they too loved the sun and were not so frightened of the tiny being as they were his father.

It was when Mercury touched the plant, caressing it between his fingers that he glanced down. Wait! Fingers!

The small digits led up into a hand, and then an arm! 

It was amazing to twirl hands and wiggle fingers about, a giggle erupted from his new vocal cords. It felt so different than being a snake. Very weird human joints.

But Mercury frowned-he felt himself do this too, so many human muscles. He was very good at distinguishing what was real and what was only a dream. This felt nice to be human, but he would eventually wake up. 

Not that he didn't like being a snake, but this felt so fun and new.

And just so real, real enough that he wanted it, and for Anthony and Agnes to know this feeling too!

The light that seeped into the room grew really bright, bright so that Mercury held his new hands in front of him, unable to see. 

"Why should a dream not be real?" An omnipotent voice asked.

"Who are you?" He asked, not able to see who or what he was talking to.

"But you already know that, so there is no point in asking me."

The voice was right, in his gut Mercury knew full well who this was. He felt such a draw and pull to the blinding and basking light.

"My dads told us about you."

"Yes they did."

"And is any of this real? Am I just imagining all of this... Lord?" He asked with a slight feeling of uncertainty and nervousness. 

If Mercury could see, he would have noticed the Almighty smile, staring down at the little boy. 

"Not everything is black and white child, your fathers-my sons-are examples of that."

"What should I do then? To keep this human thing? Can Anthony and Agnes do it too?"

She reached out to ever so gently graze the boy's cheek.

"So many questions, you and Raphael are so alike in that sense."

"Raphael?"

"You already know what's real child, you don't need me to tell you what's already true."

\--

The light and the dream were sucked from the room as Mercury opened his eyes. 

Papa Zira had told them about Heaven-though he seemed to grow uncomfortable and change the subject when Agnes would ask about other angels. He had told them about God, how he'd spoken to Her, albeit briefly once. But dad always got grumpy when their angelic father brought this up. 

Mercury sighed, curling his arms around pint size ankles.

...Hold on a minute.

Hesitently he gazed down, and was happily dumbfounded. He did it! Actually in real time and space did it!

Granted his human shape while very similar to the one he had had in the dream, there were a few mild differences. Along his arms and legs were what appeared to be gold like blotches dotting his light complexion. Standing fully-though this took a few tries as he teetered over a few times, the snake now turned boy pushed a nearby chair against the wall overlooking a small mirror. Stepping up on the cushion, he stared up at his new reflection. Green and very human eyes were mirrored back at him, his hair came tumbling down well past his shoulders. While it was a full mane of curling red hair, Mercury could see the occasional streak of snow white strands intertwined in the mix. 

Losing his balance after leaning back from the mirror the boy fell over on his behind with a small thud. 

"Hello?" A tiny voice asked from the table housing the triplets tank.

"Agnes! Agnes!" Mercury hollered, sitting up and hopping up and down being too short to climb up. 

He heard a clank and the lid to their habitat clattering onto the floor. The poor thing was still in their enclosure when the snake to human change occurred. Poking her mop of damp hair up out of the hole, Agnes glanced around for the sound. 

"Agnes! Look! We did it, we did human!" Mercury bounced about happily.

Agnes noticed her sibling hopping up and down with a new body and limbs. She took a glance down and gasped, poking her tiny belly with a finger. 

"Human! I can read better with Papa Zira!" She squealed, falling over in the tank. But still she continued laughing.

The doors to the bookshop slammed wide open, the siblings looked up to see their fathers walk in-well rather sprint in-with a giggling and squirmy toddler in the demon's arms. 

"Oh my word! It's happened to them too!" Aziraphale gasped. "My dears are you ok?"

"Lookit guys!" Anthony wriggled about feeling triumphant. "I don't know how I did it! I just did it!"

"Good thing we left the pet shop when we did," Crowley said, "And a good thing I was behind the wheel"

Aziraphale gave the demon a skeptical look, "Your driving is horrendous!"

"Call it what you want but if anyone else was driving when a small snake all of the sudden morphs into a human shaped toddler in the passenger seat, they'd crash the Bentley." 

Aziraphale strutted over with a wiggle of his sides, fussing over the additional siblings. 

"Are you two sure you're ok?"

"Well I think Agnes would feel alot better not sitting her bare bottom in tank water and moss," The fallen angel remarked, noticing the nude little girl splashing her hands in the habitat's pool.

The triplets had indeed mastered human, but failed to manifest a stitch of clothing in the process. Then again, what use did they have as snakes for garments?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Human time! Let's see what the future holds for the Crow-Fell family :)


	8. Lazing On a Snakey Afternoon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So many more kudos yall and lovely reviews last time around from returning Little_porkchop and Danielle Sired! The love all around is appreciated <3 I and the Crow-Fell family thank you!

Mercury was compliant to wearing clothes on his own, another new and interesting human aspect.

Now his siblings on the other hand were a whole other story.

"Oh dear child, please" Aziraphale begged Agnes. 

"But it feels funny!" Agnes whined, peeling away the shirt and was now squirming out of her pint size bridges. 

In the demon's futile attempt to make the load easier on his flustered angel, Crowley volunteered to take the eldest sibling with him for a few hours out of the bookshop. And of course Anthony proved to be all the more worse than Agnes, giggling and sprinting with new lean legs around Crowley's flat without a stitch on him. 

"Oi!" Crowley hollared, scurrying after the boy snake, the latter wiggling his pint size behind. 

"Snakes don't need clothes dad!" Anthony laughed.

"Well you're not exactly a snake right now, are you?"

But Crowley went ignored as Anthony ran down through the rotating wall, to which it spun violently around. As he ran past the greenery, the plant life was shaking out of frightened confusion as to just what was happening.

The snake turned boy climbed up the massive red gold throne chair.

"I'm the king! King Anthony!" He laughed.

Snapping his fingers, Crowley halted the erratic spinning wall in its tracks. Slinking into the main room, the demon crossed his arms, a smirk crossing his face.

"Well I guess there's no arguing with that." Crowley falsely gave up, "I just thought you'd want to look as cool as your old man." 

Anthony stood on the seat, leaning against the back of the chair. 

"I could dress like you?" Anthony gaped, "I can do that?"

"You could, but I guess the great King Anthony is just too cool to dress with style." He feigned

While little Anthony Jr was indeed the troublemaker of the triplets, he was after all still a boy. And most especially a daddy's boy, and imitation was a common form of flattery.

\--

It had been a week since the triplets had changed from snake to human shape, and on the sixth day they were finally fully clothed.

Not an easy task between convincing them to dress and then on how not to wear things inside out or backwards. 

Mercury gave in only two days into being human, being very open to what boys were suppose to wear. He took a liking to what they called 'jeans' and shirts with buttons in particular-but it took some trial and error to put the right button and hole together.

Surprisingly Anthony was the easiest one once he'd come around from streaking through Crowley's flat. 

It was a guess which startled Aziraphale more when the duo returned on a Friday afternoon; that Anthony was now head to toe clothed or that he was a spitting image of his demonic father down to the snakeskin boots and belt. 

Agnes was quite particular, while she relented shortly after Mercury had, the snake turned girl was fussy on fashion. 

What helped most of all though was an eleven year old in rubber boots and a red raincoat.

The Them had come to visit thankfully a day after the clothing matter had been resolved, but Agnes constantly whined and complained about what her Papa had dressed her in. Aziraphale had wanted to do it the old fashion way as oppose to miracling clothes-insisting they would always know it wasn't authentic. But despite whatever the angel had brought, she complained about an itchy shirt here, rumply skirt there. It also hadn't helped that she and Mercury were limited to longer clothes as gold color blotches crept up their arms and around their feet. 

While clothes shopping was quite boring for four eleven year olds, after Aziraphale offered to treat the Them to a round of ice cream as a reward they relented to one afternoon. 

Pepper was especially insightful to Agnes dilemma. 

"Do I wear pink? Is that a girl's color?" The little snake now girl asked.

"That's just sexist," Pepper frowned, "Pink's a rubbish color, my dad wanted me to wear a pink bicycle helmet. Try this."

Fifteen minutes later, Agnes was happily snuggled and settled in a variety of colorful sweaters and skirts reaching down past her itty bitty knees. She quite liked blue.

Of course the triplets did originate as snakes, and their eyes reflected that. While Mercury's eyes were quite human in appearance as he had figured out a way to conceal them, his siblings were still very much slit and reptilian not unlike Crowley's. Anthony was grinning ear to ear when the demon slipped a pair of black sunglasses up the bridge of his tiny nose. 

"Just like you!" He jeered happily when the demon ruffled his mop of red hair. 

Aziraphale smiled warmly at them, "I just knew you'd look alike, didn't I tell you you would?"

Agnes however was once again rather particular and wanted to be different from her brother. But Crowley found a solution quite easily passing a rack of colorful shades on the way out of shopping that afternoon. Her glasses while dark enough to conceal her blue pupils were tinted with purple lenses. Agnes was young and yet already had developed her own sense of fashion and style. 

It was certainly a new start for them and the world when the five emerged from the bookshop like a proper normal family. At least to the public eye a normal family. 

\--

"No! No wait!" Aziraphale hobbled down the grassy hill after a little black clad redhead. "Anthony!"

The boy laughed excitedly as a nesting group of ducks scattered in alarmed panic at the noise. 

Aziraphale huffed, his palms on his knees feeling winded by the chase. 

All the while, Crowley laid out on the grass snickering.

"I'm-! Glad that you...! Think this is funny..." The angel stifled.

"Oh c'mon Angel, aside from a little wildlife disturbance the kid's not stirring up any sort of real trouble."

Beside him Mercury laid on his stomach, his small feet dangling in the air back and forth, watching the people pass by. Agnes was curled up against a tree trunk, her spectacle covered eyes were glued to a book Papa Zira let her take to the park. 

All the while Anthony was about to take a cold bath as he gave chase to the retreating ducks.

\--

By now it had been five months since the triplets came to be, and a month since they had started being humans-or at least as far as snake children of an angel and a demon could be. Despite only being alive for a short amount of months, their physical forms and intellect were well beyond babies. While still much younger than Adam and his friends, the triplets as far as human went were equivalent to that of three little five year olds. It had indeed made playtime with the Them much easier, and the three were quite taken to playing in Hogback lane with the other children. 

Currently the triplets-alongside Dog-were a band of pirates overtaking Adam's ship.

"Arr!" Anthony jeered, clacking his stick sword against Brian's "King Anthony's crew is taking this ship!" 

"And we have an attack dog!" Mercury hollered, running down the crevice with a yappy former Hellhound. 

"Send out the cannonballs crew!" Adam called, to which Pepper and Wensleydale began rolling down old tires they had found in the wood toward Anthony and Agnes path.

"Watch out first mate arr!" Anthony said to his sister. 

Agnes giggled jumping past the rolling projectiles into a pile of crinkly leaves. 

Dog wagged his tail expectedly at her as she sat up. 

Blinking she glanced around, "Papa?"

Mercury helped Agnes out of the leaves, "What?"

"I thought I felt Papa here."

The boy snake blinked, "Felt?"

"Yeah. But I didn't feel daddy here."

Mercury glanced about, his green eyes saw no one but the Them and his siblings in the wood clearing. 

"Maybe they're at Miss Device cottage."

Adam noticed something was up, and tumbled down into the crevice clearing. 

"What's going on?" He asked.

"Did our dads show up? Agnes said she saw them." 

"No! Felt Papa Zira, I didn't see." She squeaked

"I think they just went to the cottage."

The former antichrist nodded, "We can stop for now, Anathema said we could come over for lunch."

"She always has the best snacks." Wensleydale smiled.

Anthony and Brian joined he rest of the children. The redhead nodded, "They aren't crickets, but I like sandwiches."

While it sounded strange, Agnes wasn't necessarily wrong when she sensed an angelic presence. But the Archangel that was hovering around the Them's getaway was certainly not Aziraphale. 

Not certain just what or who was causing this influx in power on Earth, something strong. Strong and erratic, something uncontrollable was not good news. But Gabriel was certainly going to follow this lead. It was for the greater good after all.

\--

Agnes long hair came down in damp, stringy blond strands. 

"There we go kiddo," Crowley smirked, shaking a towel through her dripping hair. She giggled at how funny the fabric felt. "All squeaky clean."

It occurred to Aziraphale and Crowley, that some miracles just wouldn't do on the triplets. One of which was when they got a little too messy, upon which the angel snapped down a miracle, yet the kids were still dirty and unaffected. Crowley attempted the same, and to no effect. And so a bath as humans do was required. 

Still too unsure if the children could handle bathing themselves, one of them always stayed with them whilst each one was given a thorough and bubbly scrubbing. On several occasions Crowley had to stop Mercury from trying to eat the bubbles. 

Anthony was almost done his bath while Aziraphale rubbed shampoo into his fiery red hair.

"Papa please!" Anthony whined when the angel placed a hand over his yellow slit eyes. 

"Now now, I don't want any suds getting in your eyes."

Taking a plastic blue bucket Agnes had been previously playing with, Aziraphale filled it with water and gently poured it over the boy's head. The angel heard a plop as he saw something small and yellow bob in the soapy water.

"Again my boy? I thought we said no sweets in the tub." Aziraphale frowned, more so as the boy snatched the hard candy out of the bath water and put it back in his mouth.

"But I was eating it before I got in the tub Papa!" Anthony smiled mischievously. Of the three he was positively addicted to sherbet lemons since Adam gave the triplets a big bag of them. 

The angel sighed, "Very well just this once."

Reaching for the towel, Aziraphale frowned. "Oh too damp, this just won't do. Just one more moment little one, I'll get a fresh towel."

Anthony splashed this way and that, reaching for the yellow duck. Giving it a hearty squeeze. Aziraphale smiled, his back turned to the tub as he opened a high up cabinet. He heard another series of squeaks. 

What he didn't expect was a literal and very loud QUACK.

Spinning around, the angel was agape as a real very alive mallard had replaced the yellow rubber ducky. 

"ANTHONY?" Aziraphale blinked at the little redhead that giggled and splashed back at the flapping bird. 

"These duckies look funny! Wensleydale showed me them in a book." The boy commented. "Should he be like the park duckies Papa?"

Without a word but with a snap, the duck then disappeared. The rubber bath toy now restored to an inanimate state. 

"Crowley!" Aziraphale called. "Crowley!!"

"What? What is it now?" The demon called, trying to fit a squirmy arm into one of Agnes nightgown sleeves.

"We have a family matter to talk about. Now." The angel stiffly stuttered, still wide eyed and alarmed as Anthony continued splashing whilst chewing the last bits of his sherbet lemon.


	9. The Winds of Change

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Little_porkchop I think you're one of my most dedicated readers of the snabies story! And I thank you for the heartwarming feedback :) And to so many kudos I've received from you all thank you! <3

"Papa! He's doing it again!" Agnes whined.

Anthony sniggered, "I did not!"

"Did too!"

Aziraphale frowned, having closed up shop just after tea time. He had hoped the triplets would be content to eat a meal together in peace with no shenanigans.

His hopes were quickly dashed. 

It was uncertain to say whether the triplets really needed food as neither angels or demons needed to consume earthly sustenance. But they had made sure the children were fed since they had started out as snakes and it made Mercury especially happy on the mornings they went out for crepes. 

Between the threat of rice being flung across the table and Anthony miracling his green beans into jelly beans, meal time tonight was exhausting to say the least.

The small loft above the bookshop also wasn't very spacious and didn't help matters. Even Crowley's flat while certainly less cluttered than the bookshop just wasn't the right kind of fit for their new family. 

Since they'd made human transformations, they needed somewhere bigger to sleep than their habitat tank. Crowley's flat was largely unused so it was no skin off his back to miracle up a king sized bed for the snake spawn-though on the nights the demon slept there it hadn't stopped Agnes from slithering into his own bed in the middle of the night. 

Aziraphale had made similar arrangements, but the bookshop was heavily cluttered and he refused to change a thing about the building with a miracle, like his aged clothing the bookshop was a relic free of divine alterations. He'd set up camp every night for the triplets during sleepover nights there with several cushy pillows and blankets in the lounge like sitting room. 

And this is why Aziraphale had been staring at the same page in his book for a good ten minutes without reading a word tonight. 

With a frown, the angel set the book down on the nightstand. He glanced over at the lump beside him in the tartan sheets. 

"Crowley..." Aziraphale said, nudging the lump. 

"Mmn..." Crowley groaned, but didn't move.

"Please dear, it's me."

"MMN!" Another grumble as he heaped more blanket over himself in protest to being disturbed.

With a sigh, Aziraphale brought down a minor miracle and let his halo manifest into reality. 

Crowley gave a yelp sitting up, his pupils black narrow slits and snake like fangs bared anticipating a divine fueled attack.

Realizing he was in no danger of angel assassins looking for a demon to smite, Crowley gave a disgruntled hiss. 

"Bless it all Angel! Something better be on fire..." Realizing what he just said he quickly backpedaled, not wanting another reminder of a burning bookshop. "Scratch that. But what do you want?"

"Well since you're up, that is I thought we could discuss the amount of space we have here for the children. It's just so-"

"Can you PLEASE turn that thing off for Heaven's sake?!" All while Aziraphale babbled on, the demon had his hands over his eyes so as not to blind himself from the heavenly light. 

Aziraphale sighed concealing his heavenly essence, as if he was the one that should be annoyed. "Right, my apologies dear boy. Now as I was saying, have you considered relocating? Not you specifically! I mean us really, the two of us and the children. Perhaps somewhere outside of London, a quiet countryside where they can play more openly. Oh yes and have rooms of their own I had hoped! The poor dears must feel so cramped being sandwiched together so often when they're here. And I know you enjoy bringing the children to your flat but it just doesn't feel cozy."

Crowley rubbed the remnants of sleep from his eyes. While he'd rather whack Aziraphale with a pillow and go back to bed, the idea wasn't one he hadn't already thought of.

"I'd need somewhere for my plants you know, and you need somewhere for your books." The redhaired demon mumbled. 

Aziraphale frowned, "I'm not too sure I could close up the bookshop."

"Not like you sell any of them."

"Oh but it's not about profit, it's the principle. I still remember the day it opened." Aziraphale smiled remembering that sunny morning, "You brought chocolates."

Crowley reached for the angel, pulling him close as his forehead pressed against his. 

"I made sure they were all your favorites, even the ones with the sweet fruity filling in them that you like so much."

Aziraphale smiled warmly, how Crowley had Fallen was beyond his understanding with how many sweet things in the guise of wicked deeds he had done for the principality.

"Alright, so leave the bookshop open. We can always drop in every once in awhile, keep the place spick and span, filled to the brim with all sorts of books. Just bring your very favorites with us." Crowley's voice became a husky whisper. The conversation seemed very casual, but when the Serpent of Eden was just grazing Aziraphale's lips with his, it may as well have been foreplay. "Perhaps I'll plant a couple flowers..." Crowley pulled away just as he felt Aziraphale lean forward. The demon had always been a teaser. "A vegetable garden perhaps...maybe an apple tree or two. Doesn't that just sound tickety boo to you, Angel?"

Aziraphale shook his head, letting a hand rest on Crowley's cheek, "You wily old serpent, I know what you're up to."

The six thousand year old tempter smirked, "And is it working?"

Aziraphale sealed it with a kiss, "Quite so dear boy."

\--

When Crowley was roused from sleep again, it was the following week-he hoped this wouldn't become habit. While demons didn't require rest, it was more of a hobby that the red headed serpent enjoyed to partake in. And with Aziraphale holding down the fort at the bookshop tonight, the red head assumed that meant a quiet night's rest for him.

At his flat tonight, he had been cocooned in dark silken sheets when he felt a tug on the blankets. Not a quiet night tonight it seemed.

"Ngk..." Crowley groaned. "'Ziraphale not again... you can show me your little house hunting pamphlets tomorrow..."

"Daddy..." 

The familiar small voice caused Crowley's yellow eyes to open and meet a similar pair, only these serpent eyes were blue. 

"Aggy?" The demon blinked, seeing his daughter's blonde hair askew, her tiny toes twitchy against the cold floor. "Wassa matter sweets?"

"It's the noise..." She whimpered. "All the noise in the sky."

As if to emphasize the problem, an ominous boom could be heard outside. 

"Ah..." He sat up in the bed, patting a vacant spot. "No need to worry about that."

Agnes hopped up onto the bed, her tiny feet wiggled pulling herself forward to sit up beside him. 

"But it sounds scary," She snuggled her face into the blankets.

Crowley pulled the child close, ever wishing to dash that fear in her eyes away. 

"Nah, it's just... Heaven throwing a wild party I imagine."

Agnes sniffled, "A party? Like Pepper's party last week with music and balloons?"

The demon smirked, "Sure kiddo. Just they didn't think to send us an invitation that's all. Noisy neighbors if you ask me. Flashy buggers."

"Daddy?" 

"Yeah Aggy?"

"Will we get to meet grandma one day?"

A boulder size lump may as well have formed in Crowley's throat. "Hng! W-What??"

Agnes sat up, scooting into the demon's lap. "Mercury got to see her already, but just him."

"Mercury?? He-???"

The snake now turned girl's lower lip quivered, not unlike her angelic father had mastered over the centuries. "Does she not like Anthony and me? Did we do something to make her mad daddy?"

Crowley stammered, not too sure how exactly to go about answering these questions. He wasn't about to lie to his own offspring and praise the Almighty when he very clearly didn't hold any warmhearted endearment for Her. 

But bless it he had to stop that sad pouty look! Last time he didn't was when the red headed demon and the children had gone for a little shopping trip in town. It was a disaster. The demon returned not only with the milk Aziraphale asked him to get but on top of that a bouquet of lollies, a bulging bag of gummy bears, and two large tubs of strawberry ice cream.

"Uhh, well no Aggy. I mean....'grandma' can be pretty unpredictable. But I'm sure She doesn't not like any of you. I mean it's impossible to really, you and your brothers are too perfect."

The lip gave pause, this time happy sniffles came to be. 

"Does that mean we can visit grandma?" Agnes asked with a tiny smile forming on her petite face. 

"I don't know if we can... for now! I mean, She's a pretty busy lady really. Work, work, work! ...Doesn't even have time for questions." 

That last remark Crowley mumbled grumpily under his breath.

"But, you said Mercury has seen her?"

"Uh huh! Right before we were able to human. Mercury said grandma talked to him when he napped, then he woke up and human!"

Talked to her?! One of his reptilian offspring had actually spoken to God, and to top that conveniently after this conversation the children suddenly succeeded morphing into human kids?

"Listen kiddo, it's hard to explain. See, your grandma and I don't really get on well, kind of hit a bit of a reef a long time ago."

The child blinked blue reptilian eyes. "Like hit a reef with a boat? Adam showed me this book he had with lots of coral reef and fish! Maybe you and grandma can fix the boat!"

Crowley couldn't help but chuckle. "Typical bookworm Aggy! Point is, it's a little hard to get in touch with Her now. But... Maybe one day you can, but we'll talk about this more with Papa Zira later. Right?"

Agnes cuddled up to her demonic father, wrapping tiny scale speckled arms around his incredibly lanky waist. 

"Okay! G'night daddy..."

His yellow eyes stared down tenderly at the mop of blonde hair that burrowed into the silky sheets. Laying down Crowley let his own arms snake around the child protectively. 

The demon stared up at the ceiling,

"Oi. This doesn't mean things are even between us, not by a long shot," He whispered as if the Almighty were listening once his eyes began to feel heavy with sleep. "But if you had something to do with this-the kids and the human thingy they did-well they seem to be pretty happy. And, so are Aziraphale and I ngk bless it all just... thanks mom."

The reptilian residents in the flat now fast asleep hadn't noticed the storm suddenly let up miraculously for the remainder of the night. Looking down upon the peace etched on Crowley's face, She thought it best after hearing that to let her son and his children get some well needed rest.


	10. Just Want to Spread My Wings and Fly!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Been awhile since I've updated, but things are going to fire up next chapter! But for now let's saunter vaguely down this one.
> 
> Thank you thank you for all the kudos, and to Ghostmilky, LittlePorkchop, wired_tired_witchcraft, Mythos, and Flittr for the comments last chapter!

School had come up on several occasions. A subject Aziraphale and Crowley knew was coming and yet were still unprepared for. 

Mercury was the first to ask.

“When can we?” He asked, fidgeting his feet. “We want to go to school with Adam, he said there are lots of kids there. Is that true?”

Aziraphale nodded, “Many children yes my dear. But I am… I am not sure if the three of you are ready just yet.”

Mercury pouted, “But Papaaaaa, why?”

Where could the angel begin? It was one thing being a concerned parent sending their offspring out into the world-which he most certainly was. But it was another when those three offspring were pint size celestial beings with reptilian nature mixed in their coding. 

“You know that you and your siblings are not like other children.”

Now Mercury was getting upset. “But Adam told us about the airbase, how he’s not like other kids! Why does he get to go and not us?”

“Adam Young has his own parents with their own set of rules.” Aziraphale stammered, he liked being the nice one. Why couldn’t Crowley have had this talk with him? “All families do things differently. For now, I’m afraid it’s just out of the question.”

This was not what the red-haired boy had wanted to hear at all. And he later grumbled about their Papa’s refusal to his siblings.

“But why not?” Anthony whined, “Kids go to school and we’re kids!” 

“What if it’s scary?” Agnes questioned. “Maybe Papa doesn’t want to scare us.”

“What could be scary when loads of kids go to school too? Adam says he was four when he started school.”

“How old are we?” The girl questioned, holding up her fingers quizzically.

“At least this many?” Anthony half asked answered, holding up a hand. “We should get to go to school!”

Mercury was still grumbling. This matter was far from over

\--

Gabriel and Beelzebub had been having too many meetings-and a few too many close calls before Michael and Uriel became a little more than suspicious of their brother’s earthly whereabouts. But the meet ups were not all for nought it seemed. Hell had felt the spike too. 

Something that both the divine and the damned were being affected and felt by. Both angels and demons whispering and mumbling amongst themselves. Was it the antichrist? Was it all part of the ineffable plan? 

And if both head offices were involved, divine and demonic disturbance…

Of course, both assumed Aziraphale and Crowley were involved and neither side happy confronting their respective traitors. But this spike was unlike such either side had seen in millennia. Nothing a single angel or Fallen alone could cause, even together. 

It may not have originated from the rebellious angel demon duo, but right now a great burst stemmed from that obnoxiously high flat Crowley held his domain in. Gabriel scowled at the serpent shaped doorbell, hearing the obnoxious ring on the other side. 

Receiving no answer, yet he could feel some type of power that had to be of demonic nature on the other side. He sighed at the use of a small but frivolous miracle, the door then swung open. 

“Demon Crowley!” Gabriel called. “We need to have a little chat about your goings on here.”

He expected to see the serpent slither in with a cocky swagger in his step and a mischievous look in those foul eyes. 

Gabriel had not expected to see big green eyes stare at him, cautiously peeking out from behind a massive potted palm. 

A child, yet not a human child from the amount of divine energy radiating off the boy. 

It seemed very unlikely that a cherub would find itself spiraling down to Earth without the Metatron knowing and authorizing such a phenomenon. 

And yet the boy looked so familiar to Gabriel’s violet irises. The curls of red hair and the lavish green that seemed to reflect off the leaves he nervously clung to.

So much like…

“You can’t be here.” The boy mumbled from behind the plant.

Gabriel cleared his throat and attempted to put on a friendly, welcoming expression. He was never good at speaking to children-the last time he spoke to Adam being an obvious example.

“Hello there… little tike.” He grinned, stepping toward the hallway of foliage. 

“Papa said not to speak to strangers.” The redhaired child scooted behind another plant. He could see the child had a green mister in his hands. 

“Well now. I guess then we should not be strangers. I’m Gabriel and perhaps you can tell me what you’re doing-“

“Dad said to REALLY not talk to you.” 

The archangel blinked. Just who was this boy? Was the demon taking in strays off the street, tempting the minds of the young human offspring?

Unless of course… But not even they would… Or possibly could…

“You need to go.” Mercury pouted, finding some spat of courage.

“I’m sorry to say I can’t, there’s someone here I need to find. Getting himself into quite a bit of trouble-“

“NO!” 

Gabriel felt himself flung backward, his back connecting with the wall. A vase shook at the tremor, but miraculously came to a halt when the boy raised his hand. 

But the archangel was not staring at his tiny hands, he was however transfixed on the feathers. The wings still had traces of pink balding at their base, but there were already a cluster of down feathers that had grown and fluttered with each breath. 

“You need to go!” Mercury demanded, his whole body shaking but brave faced. 

He could feel the fury of power, despite this child being… well he wasn’t quite sure what he was to be quite honest.

But somehow the energy spike made so much sense now. Gabriel made an immediate retreat as Mercury ran up to his father’s desk, grabbing the mobile Crowley had left behind. 

The dial tone only rang once before it picked up.

“Crowley? Is everything alright?” Aziraphale answered. 

“Papa! You need to come over.” Mercury babbled. 

“Mercury, dear one why do you have your father’s phone? Where is he?”

“He wanted to run out and grab a bottle of Chatair…Chaton….the bubbly drink you like. But Papa somebody was here. Somebody dad told us to stay away from.”

The angel’s heart sank, “Are they still there?”

“No, I scared them away!”

Aziraphale knew that could mean one of two guesses, but it was unlikely Hell’s agents would so easily give up-though he was rather curious how such a small boy frightened away an angel or two.

“Stay right where you are and stay in your father’s room. I’ll bring your sister and brother and we’ll sort this whole affair out.”

Before he hung up, Aziraphale heard another series of babbles.

“I’m sorry my dear, what was that?”

“I said, do Agnes or Anthony have wings too? How do I put them away?”

Immediately the stack of first editions the angel had been clutching clattered unceremoniously open on the carpeted floor.


End file.
